Holidays pre- and post-kids

Ah, finally, holidays! Looking forward to some time off work, sleeping in, reading books, sorting out your photos, maybe traveling to a place you’ve always wanted to go to.

That is, before you became a parent.

‘It’s a holiday when the kids go back to school!’ say all parents, myself included.

Kids always wake up early and full of energy, wherever they are. They will always want to eat the same things and not have to wait for restaurant meals.  To them, there is nothing special about being in a new place, unless it has a playground. Walking? Sure, for five minutes but not more. And, as their parent (..on holiday), you still have to feed them, entertain them, bathe them, read 15 books until they fall asleep, and just…keep them alive.

It’s hardly the break you so desperately need. In fact, it can be quite the opposite.

What you can do

While we can’t change how exhausting full-time childcare outside of the home can be, there are things we can do to still enjoy our holidays. Here are some tips:

1. Expect and embrace chaos – if it’s chaos at home every day, a hotel room won’t look any different.
2. Spend less time on your phone. Smartphone usage is not only linked to increased stress overall, it steals your attention away from the present moment and shifts it to things that, most of the time, are less important and definitely not urgent while on holiday. Talking about your phone…
3. Stop looking at and comparing other people’s holiday photos on social media. They might not have kids, or they might choose to only share the good moments they have with them. Talking about comparison…
4. Let go of expectations. You should do your best to stick to routines and habits, while being prepared to let go of how you’d like things to look like. Your kids will have fries and ice-cream more often than you’d like, and they will go to bed much later than usual. It’s OK. As my grandmother says, ‘learning and un-learning are next to each other’.
5. Remember what it was you used to love doing on holiday before you had kids and do a mini-version of it. For example, I used to love taking photos, so I still carry my camera around for a shot or two. It brings me joy and makes for good photos albums.
6. Consider your non-negotiables. What are some things that you know make you feel good (perhaps from my stress-less mum checklist?) and you can still do while on holiday? Mine are:
   • drinking enough water, especially in the middle of the summer
   • getting enough sleep (which, when you have kids, translates to going to bed not too late)
   • having protein with every meal (easy to miss when you’re out and about!)
   • moving every day

What are yours?

Holidays with small kids might not be the break we desperately need, but they do present an opportunity: to let go of our need to control or do things perfectly, to accept instead of fight (and increase our mental fitness) . Seeing it like that, it might just be exactly what we need.

With that, I wish you a lovely holiday!

Photo by Kindel Media